Shattered Mirrors
by clockwork crow
Summary: Hana is contemplating on his hidden side...can Ru save him before it's too late? self-injury, yaoi, RuHana
1. chapter 1

Title - Shattered Mirrors  
Disclaimers - I don't own them...Just borrowing them...  
Author's note - Hana is very OOC, and eventual RuHana...did I say eventual? And other   
pairings  
Angst, rape, self injury, yaoi...duh!just mentioned it up there!   
I was feeling really, really off my rocket and sick physically and mentally when I wrote   
this...  
Poor Hana's not all there...  
  
** - emphasis  
  
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Chapter 1  
  
Hana's home  
Bathroom  
2:34 am Monday  
  
  
D'aho.  
  
Baka!  
  
You idiot Sakuragi! You're going to pay for this!  
  
Who's the pretty boy here then? You shouldn't be wandering in the streets alone...  
  
  
Do you know me? Sakuragi stared at the mirror and mouthed the words. The boy in the   
mirror mumbled back at him. Why does his eyes look so dead?   
  
They all hate you. Look at you. You're ugly. You're dirty.   
  
Don't cry. Boys don't cry. Sakuragi huddled himself next to the bathtub, instinctively   
drawing his knees into his arms. Why won't the pain go away?   
  
No one cares. They've all abandoned you.   
  
How many times has he woken up in the middle of night, shaken and drenched in cold sweat   
as he relived his past? No one ever comes.   
  
No one ever wants to know you. I'm just a stupid, idiotic D'aho. The laughing maniac.   
The butt of all jokes. The red monkey. The Naïve King. The guy rejected by 50 girls   
now going for the grand total of 51. Why should they care? They don't know me.  
  
Sakuragi struggled to suppress oncoming onslaught of pain. Memories. What are they anyway?  
Why do they keep haunting me? Some slips away just like a sunset. One moment it was here,   
the next, gone. Some just stays around, hovering over you like a ghost eager to deliver you  
to the edges of insanity.   
  
Sakuragi stared at the sharp blade grasped tightly in his fist.   
  
Go away please. I don't want to remember.   
  
Flash of red and silver. Pain flooded through his senses as Sakuragi licked at the crimson   
drops. Another slash on the other wrist. Pain. He could endure it. A reminder that he   
was still alive, much as he wanted to be in the other world. He deserved it.   
  
Sakuragi watched, fascinated at the bright red river that gushed out from his wound. He had  
been cutting himself for months, always in the same place so the others would not notice.   
  
Temporary relief. Pain. Red.  
  
Sakuragi sighed and leaned back staring at the ceiling.   
  
Am I a freak? What will the others think of me now?   
  
Sakuragi smirked to himself. I'm already a freak. Why would they care if I am one?  
  
"Damn you Hanamichi! Get the hell out of there! I need the bathroom!" A loud banging woke   
Sakuragi from his stupor.  
  
Sakuragi cursed himself and scrambled for the bandages in the cabinet. Damn Oyaji for   
getting drunk again. The blade was slippery with his blood but that was alright. He would  
wash it tomorrow. Oyaji never notices these things.   
  
Can you get poisoning from rusty blades? Doesn't matter.  
  
"Get the fuck out!"   
  
Oyaji, Sakuragi 's adopted father, screamed through the thin door just as Sakuragi opened it.   
The blast of sour alcoholic breath almost made Sakuragi gag.   
  
"Get out!" Oyaji bellowed, shoving his way past the red head.  
  
Sakuragi winced as the door slammed behind him. He should be glad the old man didn't hit   
him *this* time. He still had that large bruise on his chest from the old man's last drinking  
spree. He often wondered how that 60 year old man could hit with such a bruising force.   
  
Sakuragi sighed and went back to his bedroom and started to wrap his cut wrist up with   
practiced ease. He had been cutting himself almost nightly for the past two weeks. Part of  
him wished to stop; part of him wished it wouldn't.   
  
Basketball.   
  
That's all he lived for now. There is nothing more.   
  
  
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Much better now! I did this in the .doc format but only one page appeared. There was two!!  
Stupid computer... 


	2. chapter 2

THANKS FOR D REVIEWS GUYS/GURLS!!!! LUV YAH ALL!!!  
  
Warnings - yaoi, angsty Hana-kun....poor monkey...he's not all there...eventual pairing with   
Hana...Hmmmm...and shounen-ai...for Ru...  
  
Disclaimers - like every other disclaimer thingy you read...dunno y you are reading this if   
you already know what the answer is.  
  
I took more than 2 weeks to think what to write next...and to get into that "I'm-suicidal"   
mood. Since it's Monday tomorrow, I guess I sorta depressed...which is the mood I need ta   
be in. So enjoy d ficcy!!! Feedbacks are welcome coz I'm not sure if I'm portraying a   
suicidal Hana realistically...to the manga and the anime anywayz.  
  
// - thoughts  
+++ - next scene or whatever...  
  
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Chapter 2  
  
Basketball practice  
Afterschool  
Locker room  
  
Sakuragi pulled his drenched shirt over his shoulders. He was tired, not to mention dizzy   
from the lack of food. He reasoned that he would have to eat tonight...even though he still  
didn't feel like eating. Getting chased by Miyagi and chasing Rukawa does expend a lot of   
energy.   
  
Sakuragi sighed. //Maybe I should be like Rukawa instead.// He knew that his mask was crumbling,   
it simply took too much energy to maintain, physically and emotionally.   
  
The red head suddenly heard the familiar screaming followed by the Ayako's paperfan whacking  
sounds. Miyagi must have been freaking out about that friendly practice with Ryonan...again.   
  
//I just don't get why shorty is freaking out?! We are already representing our district.//  
  
Under Miyagi's leadership, Shohoku had steadily increased in strength and size. The size   
part mostly due to Rukawa's adoring and awe-struck...boys. Sakuragi had found it rather   
amusing at first that Rukawa had a secret boy fan club. As usual, Rukawa had ignored the   
boys as well as the girls. Not surprising though. Mr. I'm-too-cool-for-you never pays   
attention to anything unless it had something to do with superior basketball skills.  
  
Sakuragi tossed his rumpled shirt into his bag and adjusted both his wrist guards. He had   
taken to using wrist guards after cutting so often lately. The scars were becoming too   
prominent even when compared to his tanned skin.  
  
Basketball. The only thing he lived for or so he keeps telling himself. But, lately he was   
losing interest to his *one* interest.   
  
He absentmindedly pushed his auburn bangs off from his sweaty face. They had grown back,   
fast, after he had shaved them, just to spite the old man so he wouldn't try anything on   
him. Hoping that by being somewhat uglier, he woulnd't notice him much. Sakuragi had freaked   
out one night when the old man approached him, drunk as usual, trying to pull his pants down.   
Sakuragi had ran out of the house and spent a freezing and uncomfortable night sleeping on a   
park bench. It would have been more comfortable had it not been those mongrel cats with fleas   
jumping on him, purring like a rusty motor, clinging like a leech on his lap.  
  
Sakuragi sighed as he mused what he had to do tonight. Shopping, making dinner, wash dishes,  
clean house, homework...all the while trying to avoid Oyaji jumping on him. He suddenly   
felt like he aged 30 years in 5 seconds.  
  
He turned to the door just as Rukawa slid the door open.   
  
Cold blue eyes met with chocolate brown. //Was it just my eyes or did Rukawa actually look   
surprised? That block of ice finally showed some sort of feeling?//  
  
"Kitsune."  
  
Rukawa blinked, his icy exterior surfacing again. "...d'aho."  
  
Sakuragi's mask fell back on. "Humph. The Tensai has better things to do than getting rid   
of stupid kitsunes." With that Sakuragi side-stepped quickly around our superstar rookie   
and headed outside.   
  
Rukawa stared at the retreating figure of the d'aho. //Do I need my eyes checked? Did my   
do'aho lose his sparkle for moment? That naïve and childish twinkle?// Rukawa   
continued to stare after the red-haired Tensai, oblivious to the fact that Haruko was   
beside him stammering something about water.  
  
//Did I say my do'aho?// Rukawa mused over the fact for a minute before shaking his head.   
//Nah...//   
  
  
+++  
  
  
Saturday  
Ryonan friendly match day  
  
  
"Hanamichi!!! You're late!!!" Ayako's trusty paperfan appeared and gave the aforesaid red   
head several well-deserved whacks. Well-deserved to her anyways.  
  
Sakuragi did what the Sakuragi everyone knew would do. "Ack! Female Gori!"   
  
*Whack whack*  
  
//I don't even know why I try so hard.// Sakuragi had another 'night horror' attack, he   
couldn't really remember what he dreamt but the next thing he remembered was waking up in   
the bathroom with a terrible headache. His left wrist sitting in a pool of dried blood,   
the other had to be peeled off from his boxers. Vaguely, Sakuragi remembered recalling that  
he was late for the match, judging by the sound that Oyaji made as he stumbled into the   
kitchen for another bottle of sake.   
  
Sakuragi had run all the way to the station and found the Shohoku team had started the game   
without him.  
  
"Hanamichi!! Where have you been?!?!?!" Miyagi screamed and glared at the first year red   
head. "Get on the court now!"  
  
"Hohoho." Anzai Sensai echoed.  
  
"do'aho."   
  
"Nice to see you again Hanamichi." Sendoh smiled at the other side. "I was hoping that   
you'll turn up sometime." Sendoh had been sick on the day of the match between Shohoku and   
Ryonan. As the result, Ryonan lost by quite a margin.  
  
"The Tensai's gonna beat you today! Buwahahahahaha!!!!"   
  
"Baka red haired monkey."  
  
"You Oyaji!!!"   
  
//God. I feel so stupid.// Sakuragi was glad that his voice did not shake from his fatigue.  
//I should be feeling excited about this rematch. Why do I feel so empty inside?//   
Sakuragi turned his face away from Sendoh, his warm chocolate eyes clouded with an   
unreadable expression.   
  
Rukawa frowned. //What's wrong with his do'aho? Why does he look so...empty? Why the hell  
was he getting so worried over his do'aho?!?!?!? He's a red-haired, loud-mouthed baka!   
Dammit! Why is he calling Hana-kun his do'aho? Why is he calling him Hana-kun????//   
  
Nearby, Yasuka was trying not to cringe away when he saw the thundercloud in Rukawa's face   
while the newest members in the basketball team drooled all over their rookie star player.  
  
  
+++  
  
Last 10 minutes of the match  
  
  
//Maybe I should have eaten breakfast after all.// Sakuragi fought another wave of dizziness.  
He had been struggling to stay on his feet for the last 10 minutes of the game. The   
blackness at the edge of his vision was threatening to spill over and make themselves   
permanent.  
  
Dimly, he was aware that Koshino had dodged Miyagi and thrown the ball to Sendoh, who was   
approaching to slam-dunk the ball into the basket. Sakuragi mustered the last of his   
remaining strength to snatch, or do the famous *fly-squat*, the ball out of Sendoh's skilled hands.   
  
For a moment, Sakuragi felt he was flying through the air momentarily before the darkness   
claimed him.  
  
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I've revised it!!! Sorry for all my boo boos...  
Hana-kun is definately not all there, and poor Ru is so confused...  
And yes, Hana did faint. 


	3. chapter 3

Warnings - shounen-ai ... believe me it's getting there...Hana-kun's OOC and so's Ru...I believe that   
someone should be satisfied now!  
  
Sorry for the delay! ^_^   
  
Thanx 4 d reviews! I hope I'll get more this time!!! so...  
  
REVIEW PLEASE!!! NEED MORE IDEAS TO HELP WITH WRITER'S BLOCK!!!!!   
  
This,I believe is one of the longest chapter I've written...  
  
// - thoughts  
  
  
  
%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%  
  
  
  
SHATTERED MIRRORS - CHAPTER 3  
  
  
  
  
Dream sequence...  
  
  
  
Rough hands reached and shoved him against the brick wall.  
  
  
"What cha doin' here 'dis late boy?" The figure sneered.  
  
  
"I - I'm s-s-sorry s-sir." The boy stammered out, trying not to wince when the man shoved his roughly   
against the wall again.   
  
  
The man caressed the boy's flawless cheek. "Lil' boys shouldn't be out dat late. You're a very bad boy."  
  
  
"I-I'm just go-going home s-sir." The boy's large, brown eyes widened when he felt a rough hand reaching   
to a place where, even his naïve mind could relate, that this is a bad thing.  
  
  
"Lil' boy's should be punished 'fer being late..." The voice whispered, silently invading the boy's sweet   
mouth with his own.  
  
  
  
  
  
%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%  
  
  
  
  
  
Ryonan school...  
  
  
  
Hanamichi sat up panting, his silent scream still ringing in his ears. //Not again. I don't want to remember...//   
Fuzzily, Hanamichi wondered where he was and where he could find a bathroom to...//No. I can't believe I'm   
thinking that way...even if I am a freak. //  
  
  
"Sakuragi. You finally woke up!" Ayako appeared from the doorway looking irritated and worried at the same time.   
"That was one impressive thud when you fell over. Daijoubu?"  
  
  
//Of course I'm awake! What do you care about anyway? // Hanamichi forced his usual idiotic grin on his face.   
"I'm the Tensai!!! Of course I'm alright!!! I've got a hard head!!! MUAHHAHAHAAH!!!!" He gave Ayako a victory   
sign and leaped out of bed.   
  
  
Ayako sweatdropped.  
  
  
"Did we win?" Hanamichi asked impatiently fumbling to tie his shoelaces. //Good, nobody had moved my wrist guards.//   
He have a silent sigh of relief. //I wonder what they would do if they did find out...probably kick me out of the   
team and more idiotic names to call me. As if 'baka' and 'do'aho' wasn't enough...//  
  
  
"Yes, by one point. Rukawa snatched the ball off the floor and shot in a three-pointer just before the end.   
Sendoh was shocked when you weren't moving by his feet."   
  
  
"Smiley actually has more than one expression on his face? That's an improvement!! Of course, there's nothing to   
worry about!! The Rebound King never gets hurt!!!" Hanamichi exclaimed. //Well, at least the game ended. Guess   
I'll just go home and sleep. Hopefully, I don't have to wake up again.//  
  
  
"Sakuragi! Where the hell do you think you're going? I have not finished talking to you yet!" Ayako's fan suddenly   
made itself known on Hanamichi's head.   
  
  
Hanamichi shrugged. Ayako's trusty fan, for once, seems to have lost its effectiveness somehow. "I'm going home."   
//Going home to wallow in my own misery. Not that you care.//  
  
  
Hanamichi opened the door of the infirmary, ignoring Ayako's screeches about a certain red-headed baka and promptly   
bumped into a black-haired, drooling kisune.  
  
  
Rukawa woke up even more annoyed than usual. He had been having a delicious dream of a certain monkey with whipped   
cream and strawberries. He was NOT pleased to be woken up so suddenly. Hence, it was only natural he punched the   
person in front of him who dared to wake him.   
  
  
*OOOF*  
  
  
Hanamichi suddenly found himself looking at the stars again.   
  
  
Rukawa blinked sleepily. He had been waiting for that do'aho to wake up. Unfortunately, Gori had managed to watch   
the last 10 minutes of the game, including the part when his do'aho bashed his head onto the floor. And it was also   
Gori's bright idea for him to drag that do'aho home before he actually oversleeps in that pervert's school.   
Something about Sakuragi being more lively and hence more movable when he was around...lively, Rukawa supposed as   
in wanting-to-head-bash-him lively.   
  
  
"You stupid kitsune!!" Hanamichi screeched, pointing rudely at Rukawa.   
  
  
"Do'aho." Rukawa replied automatically.   
  
  
The two first-years glared at each other furiously, or at least that's what appeared to others. Rukawa was actually   
admiring his do'aho's bright, large, brown eyes, drowning in its delicious chocolate warmth. Hanamichi was trying   
hard not to appear abnormal, staring intently back at the kitsune wearing his furious mask on his face.  
  
  
//Never noticed the kitsune has blue eyes before...Ack! What am I thinking about? I should get back home before   
Oyaji comes back...//  
  
  
Ayako's fan smacked the pair of juniors on the head. "Get on moving! Practice tomorrow and it's your turn to polish   
the floor Sakuragi! And if you're late again you'll be doing 20 laps around the court including basics!"  
  
  
Hanamichi grumbled something obscene under his breath. //Yes, of course. Bully me around while you still can,   
female Gori. I know it's everyone's favorite hobby.//  
  
  
  
%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%  
  
  
  
"I'm home now. Get lost kitsune." Hanamichi growled. The whole way home had been filled with many insults and   
curses and fistfights and headbutts. Nevertheless, Hanamichi felt revived for a short time. At least fighting   
with the kitsune is something that would never really change.  
  
  
"Do'aho."   
  
  
"Teme kitsune!"   
  
  
"Baka."  
  
  
"Urasai! Fox-eyes!"  
  
  
The two stood there glaring at each other.   
  
  
"Go home stupid fox." Hanamichi snorted finally. //Leave me alone dammit! I don't need you here!//  
  
  
Rukawa turned and started back to his own home, not before muttering do'aho under his breath.   
  
  
"Hey! I heard that!" Hanamichi shouted back, waving his arms in that adorable chibi style.  
  
  
Rukawa smirked inwardly at the image. //His Hana looked so cute when he's angry. Wait...did he say his?//   
Rukawa huffed in annoyance. //so maybe he did...but the baka did look cute when his face matched with his hair!//  
  
  
Rukawa let his instincts direct him back to his house as he sleep-walked and dreamed of a fiery headed   
monkey...sitting next to him...in a darkened theatre...  
  
  
  
  
&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&  
  
  
  
  
Hanamichi opened the door cautiously. //Damn. Oyaji's back early today.//  
  
  
"Where the fuck have you been? Get your ass over here!" A gruff voice slurred. There was a fumbling sound   
and Hanamichi's adopted father stood by the doorway, holding a sake bottle in one hand and vodka in the other.  
  
  
Hanamichi backed away towards his room slowly, praying that he wouldn't be too badly hurt this time.   
//Why should I care? Nobody cares. If pain is inevitable, why not just get it over with?//  
  
  
"Answer me! Idiot! Where the fuck did you go? Didn't I tell you to quit that fucking basketball team?"   
  
  
Hanamichi's eyes widened with fear, and struggled to make his tongue work. "I-I w-w-w-ent t-to -"  
  
  
"To where?" Oyaji seethed, gulping down the last drops from his vodka bottle.   
  
  
"To s-study."   
  
  
"I don't want your bullshit! I asked you where - have- you- been?" Oyaji took a step closer to Hanamichi.  
  
  
"To t-the game..." Hanamichi whispered, lowering his head.  
  
  
"Why didn't you quit the team you fucking bastard! Ungrateful wretch! I don't want your lying bullshit   
around the house!"  
  
  
Hanamichi closed his eyes and phased out. He had been doing this a lot lately. But it's a useful skill to  
have.   
  
  
Phasing out blinded his mind. It was as if he was a spirit, watching, acknowledging what was happening   
to his body as his father punched him in the face and kicked his sore ribs. He watched in wonder as the   
delicate glass bottle of empty vodka broke over his shoulder, rivets of blood oozed out and stained the white   
shirt.   
  
  
An endless rain of blows thundered down on the person's still body.   
  
  
The spirit gazed in fascination at the crimson liquid dripping slowly down the cheek.  
  
  
  
&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&  
  
  
TBC   
  
you know what to do...click on the lil button down there... 


	4. chapter 4

Chapter 4  
  
  
  
Notes:  
  
  
  
C'mon minna! Ya HAVE ta REVIEW if you want MORE! I know you've been reading it! I'm PSYCHIC!  
  
  
  
Yup, the father is rather…mentally disturbed in chapter 3. I do hope everyone is pissed at him. (pauses   
and decides that everyone is indeed pissed, judging from the reviews) Hana is mentally disturbed too...…t  
hey are quite a family aren't they?   
  
  
  
Ru is coming soon don't worry Hana!  
  
  
  
Warnings: furthur Hana abuse *wails *, and language  
  
  
  
  
  
  
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Blood is such a fascinating liquid. It could be used to dye white shirts a faded pink. It could be murder or  
it could save. And the color! The crimson delicious warmth vampire bats thrive on.   
  
  
And it's so fascinating to watch it drip down slowly, drop by drop, sometimes in rivets, sometimes gushing out   
like a broken water pump.   
  
  
And the pain! The unforgettable pain of release from nightly horrors and inner demons. A small price to pay for   
a priceless treasure.   
  
  
The bearing of one's soul into the physical world.   
  
  
Hanamichi stared at the boy in the mirror licking the living liquid from his wrist.   
  
  
Is that what I have become?  
  
  
  
  
  
* * * * * * * *  
  
  
  
  
  
"Where is that idiot?!" Miyagi screamed at Yasuka, who cringed away wondering yet again, why Shohoku's   
basketball team is made up of such loud and violent people and what possessed him to join it in the first   
place.  
  
  
"Probably lost too many brain cells when he hit the floor yesterday. Forgot the way to school." Mitsui   
replied, casually scoring a 3-pointer. //I'm still the best!!!// He smirked at the whooshing sound behind him.   
  
  
Ayako tapped her foot impatiently for the baka to come. That first year lazy idiot probably wanted to avoid   
polishing floors. //When he comes tomorrow I'll make him run around the school 50 times before doing basics.//   
She smirked to herself. //And then he will polish the floors and wash the windows afterwards…and maybe scrub   
the dirty basketballs as well.//  
  
  
Rukawa shrugged nonchalantly. He was not worried about the do'aho. Of course not! He's just an annoying,   
troublesome, loud, cute, fiery, kind, naive, handsome do'aho. Did he just think that? Rukawa flashed past   
some un-named Shohoku player. He was not falling for that loud red-haired baka. NO. He was just worried.   
Like an enemy worries about his enemy. That must be it. Yes. Like a soon-to-be-friends enemy. Like a   
soon-to-be-friend-and-hopefully-more-than-that enemy...  
  
  
  
  
  
* * * * * * * *  
  
  
  
  
  
Hanamichi woke up to the sound of doorbell. He must have fallen asleep after taping his wrists with dirty   
bandages.  
  
  
//Must be that social worker again.// Hanamichi groaned as he struggled to stand up. The room swayed dangerously,   
as if an untimely earthquake had struck only his room. //Luckily I've just cleaned up the living room ... and   
the hallway...//  
  
  
  
  
  
* * * * * * * *  
  
  
  
  
  
He couldn't believe the absurdity of this. Part of him wanted to hop around with joy, part of him wanted to murder   
Gori.  
  
  
He's not even our captain anymore! WHY does he even get a SAY in this?!  
  
  
Rukawa scowled at the battered house he had just been to last night. //What am I suppose to say?! Hello do'aho..  
Gori's sister...What's her name again? Was worried about you…and Gori threatened to beat me up if I didn't   
come and drag you over for practice?//  
  
  
The door creaked open slowly. A large brown eye appeared in a barely seeable crack.   
  
  
"R-r-rukawa?!" Hanamichi was surprised enough to forget his enemy's pet name.   
  
  
"Do'aho." Rukawa tried to push the door open. //A few more inches and I can grab hold of his wrist and drag   
him to Gori.//  
  
  
"What are you doing here?" Hanamichi hissed. His head ached from the spot where his father had accidentally   
pounded it against the wall. //Stupid fox. If Oyagi saw you here, you'll be an eternally sleeping fox...//  
  
  
Rukawa glared coldly at the red head.   
  
  
"Go away you smelly kitsune! I don't want you shedding fur all over my house!! You-"   
  
  
Rukawa frowned inwardly. //What is wrong with his do'aho? It's like he's missing something ... something   
important...// Shrugging internally, he grabbed the baka's wrist and proceeded the tedious and most likely   
sweaty process, to the school's basketball courts.   
  
  
Perhaps it was the sharp intake of breath.  
  
  
Or maybe it was that wet sticky, rough warmth.  
  
  
Rukawa found himself suddenly aware of holding his Hana's bleeding left wrist.  
  
  
  
  
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That took a looong time to write ... believe me...nothing's worst than a writer's block.  
  
Anwayz, I'm sorry it's short...er...shorter than the other chapters? But it should keep you happy for now...  
  
More reviews AND helpful tips as to how this plot should proceed = faster updates   
  
Yosh!!! See that lil' cute button down there?  
  
Press it and you might just get what you wish for... 


	5. chapter 5

CHAPTER 5  
  
  
Continuing on . . .^_^  
  
THANKS for all da people who reviewed!!!!!!  
  
I cannot thank you enough!!!  
  
So I made this chapter longer . . .! Wo-hoo!!!! As a reward . . .  
  
And shoved it on faster too. . .  
  
  
  
Warnings: further Hana-chan abuse . . . bad language . . .   
  
// . . . // thoughts  
". . ." speech  
  
( . . .) cat thoughts / talk = = = you're understand when you get to that part. . .  
  
  
This is revised...because of all the spelling boo boos...  
and because the crows wanted to change a little something at the end...  
so i did...  
coz the crows are my muses...  
  
  
  
  
= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =   
  
  
  
  
  
Hanamichi involuntarily flinched when he felt his cuts rip open. Struggling not to wince, he shook his wrist   
rudely out of Rukawa's reach. "What did you do that for?! You stupid kitsune!"  
  
  
Ice-cold blue eyes widened at the red stain seeping slowly through his Hana's bandages. //He's hurt! Who did   
this to him?! Who dared to touch no hurt HIS Hana?!// Rukawa's eyes flickered with anger. //Nobody touches HIS   
possessions . . . okay so Hana is not technically his yet but he will be!//  
  
  
The boy in the mirror felt his heart clench with panic. //This wasn't supposed to happen. The stupid kitsune   
looks so angry but then who wouldn't be? Who would like to be blackmailed into dragging your archenemy around   
town?// Hana's spirits sank lower. //Why do I care what he thinks anyway? He never showed me anything better   
than a death glare. Nobody ever showed me anything better than a glare. Not even . . .// Hana reigned the boy   
back inside him and slapped on his baka mask.  
  
  
Grinning stupidly, Hanamichi brushed past an angry kitsune, towards the direction of Shohoku High. "The Tensai   
was washing the dishes when a knife jumped up and tried to kill me. It must have been jealous of the Tensai's   
good looks. Since I'm the greatest genius ever, the knife didn't do anything much but scratch me a little, which   
is more than I can say for you stupid kitsune."  
  
  
Rukawa glowered at the retreating fiery-headed figure. //Nobody that stupid will believe that lie. Who dared hurt   
HIS Hana? Who had so much control over his doaho that the idiot would go as far as lying for him?// Rukawa stalked   
after Hanamichi, his blue eyes scowling at the monkey. //If it is that pervert Sendoh, hes going to die a slow   
and painful death or maybe its that old guy, Maki, from Kainan or maybe it is . . .//  
  
  
  
  
  
= = = = = = = == = = = = =   
  
  
  
  
Rukawa was still glowering as he slouched his way into the basketball courts.   
  
  
"Did you get the baka Rukawa?" Ayako immediately pounced on him when he slid the door open.   
  
  
Rukawa gave a slight nod and headed silently to the hoops. His bad mood did not improve the slightest as his fan   
club began chanting his name like some ancient occult, the moment he set foot through the door.   
  
  
Make that chanting and screaming . . .  
  
  
Oh eek! And drooling. . .  
  
  
  
  
= = = = = = = = = = = = = =   
  
  
  
  
Hanamichi had gone to the school nurse for the jealous knife wound. Of course the nurse didn't believe him. Who   
would anyway? But she never said anything to him, just bandaged his wrists and shooed him out of her office. Unwanted   
as always. At least he had cleaner bandages, he mused to himself.   
  
  
The warm afternoon heat seems to be disappearing. A cold wind picked up from the North, scattering the leaves   
outside the basketball court. Shivering, Hanamichi was just about to throw open the door, and shout out in his   
make believe idiocy, his beloved existence to the world, when . . .   
  
  
voices . . .   
  
  
talking about him. . .  
  
  
Tentatively, Hanamichi pressed an ear to the door and immediately wished he hadn't.   
  
  
". . . seen that idiot!" Miyagi bellowed. "Hopeless case!"  
  
  
"I don't want to sound mean or anything. . ." Haruko's voice sounded somewhat muffled through the door. "but   
Sakuragi-san hasn't been improving a lot lately. He's always late and disappears early."  
  
  
"Not improving? That's an understatement! If the baka comes today, I'll be expecting him to polish the floors   
and run 50 times around the school! And then do the basics!"  
  
  
"Wasting my time with him when I could be practicing. That ungrateful bastard! He walked out on me! I waited   
TWO fucking hours!" Mitsui said angrily. "If Anzai-sensei didn't insist on teaching that baka, I wouldn't even   
bother playing against him at all!"  
  
  
"Think on the good side of it Mitchy. At least we don't need to listen to his stupid song! Or listen to his   
yapping voice!"  
  
  
"Oh God! Don't remind me of the song! I didn't . . ."  
  
  
Hanamichi supposed he should feel upset. Perhaps even angry enough to charge in and punish them with head butts.   
He should at least feel something . . . right? Sadness? Betrayal?   
  
  
No.   
  
  
He didn't feel anything.   
  
  
Maybe he was still shocked.   
  
  
Shocked over their bluntness. . .   
  
  
Shocked over their betrayal. . .   
  
  
Shocked over their hatred . . .  
  
  
No. . .  
  
  
He wasn't shocked.   
  
  
He wasn't even surprised.  
  
  
He just . . .* was *  
  
  
He felt nothing.  
  
  
Absolutely nothing.  
  
  
It was just like that phasing out he did whenever Oyaji beats him. Only more physical.   
  
  
He wasn't the spirit anymore. He was still him. Still the boy in the mirror he saw everyday.  
  
  
Hanamichi sighed softly to himself and turned to go back home. He doesn't like staying in a place where he doesn't belong.  
  
  
Come to think about it. . . he doesn't really belong home either. . .  
  
  
  
  
= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =   
  
  
  
  
Two hours later found Hanamichi sitting on a park bench. This was the park where he had always retreated to when   
he couldn't return home.   
  
  
It was a quiet place. Not many people visited here, or even knew of this forgotten place. The park was rumored to   
be the pick-up place where child murderers hid. After last year's incident of an 8-year old body found drowned in   
the small pond, the park had been left even more deserted.   
  
  
A lonesome and forgotten place . . . kind of like himself. Hanamichi thought ruefully as he absentmindedly stroked   
the soft black head of a stray cat purring on his lap.  
  
  
"Are you all by yourself too?"  
  
  
The cat purred in reply, blinking his golden eyes at the red-head. (I'm with you, stupid human.)  
  
  
The human frowned. "Aren't you the one who slept on my head last week?"  
  
  
Purrrrrrrrr~~~~~~. (I'm surprised you remember. This is * my * territory you know. . . I smelled your blood the   
moment you walked you entered.)  
  
  
Hanamichi sat there for a moment, as the cat took a cautious sniff at his bandaged hand.  
  
  
"You know, they never even ask. There was never a 'how are you Sakuragi?' or a 'how do you feel today Hana' it   
has always been a 'urasai baka!'"  
  
  
The cat purred at the human. (how did you get hurt?)  
  
  
"Mitsui didn't even ask me why I was late. Nobody did."  
  
  
(Who is Mitsui?)  
  
  
"They didn't even ask me why I didn't turn up for a whole week when Oyaji accidentally fractured my left ankle. . .   
  
  
"Or the time when I had my left wrist bandaged up for the world to see. . .  
  
  
"Maybe thats why I don't really care. . . There's nothing left to be cared for. . . They never bothered to ask me   
why I acted like the baka. They never tried to see past the mask. . ."  
  
  
The cat could see clearly that his human pet was upset. Puuurrrrrrrrrr~~~~~ (Dont be upset! Give me a tummy rub!)  
  
  
"Are you hungry?" Hanamichi asked softly, wiping away a stray tear from his cheek.  
  
  
Purrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. (starving. . .but rub my tummy first. . .) The cat turned on his back revealing a stripped gray   
tummy. (rub. . . rub. . .)  
  
  
Hanamichi rubbed the tomcat's soft belly as requested. "I wish I could be a cat too. . ."  
  
  
Puuurrrrrrrrrrrrrr. . . (I'm glad you're not. )  
  
  
  
  
= = = = = = = = = = = = = =   
  
  
  
  
"ITS BEEN TWO HOURS! WHERE THE HELL IS THAT BAKA?!?!?!" Ayako screeched, whacking her paper fan against the wall.   
"RUKAWA YOU BETTER EXPLAIN THIS!!!!"  
  
  
Rukawa shrugged and stalked out of the courts, his spirits at an all time low. //Where is my do'aho? He said he'll   
be here after he went to the nurse. . .// He slung his bag over his shoulder gracefully. //Maybe he lost his way. . .//  
  
  
"RUKAWA!! IM TALKING TO YOU!!!!" Ayako screeched again.  
  
  
Rukawa turned to face the fuming female slowly. " . . ." translation: go away I'm in a bad mood.   
  
  
Ayako stopped her screaming for a moment to decipher his '. . .', by then Rukawa was already off looking for his   
lost do'aho.   
  
  
"OI!!! GET YOUR ASS BACK IN HERE RUKAWA!!!!"  
  
  
  
  
  
  
= = = = = = = = = = = =   
  
  
  
  
  
Hanamichi clutched his chest as he ran down the block, away from the place called home. . . away from the place where   
Oyaji was. . .   
  
  
He was only 15 minutes late! He didn't go to practice either! Just like Oyaji wanted him to.   
  
  
Of course he hadn't believed him. Who'd believe in him anyway?  
  
  
Oyaji was drunk again. So what else was new?   
  
  
A broken rib? Or maybe it was fractured . . .   
  
  
Half a dozen of permanent blue and yellow bruises decorated all over his body?  
  
  
The pain threatened to drown out his senses. Maybe it is best that way. At least he's still alive . . .  
  
  
He staggered into the forgotten park, the gray cat stared unblinkingly at the bruised and bleeding human.   
  
  
So it was another night in the park for him . . .  
  
  
What else is new?  
  
  
Funny. . . he could have sworn the gray cat turned black there for a moment. . .  
  
  
Maybe it was getting dark. . .  
  
  
  
  
  
= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =   
  
  
I revised this so it's flowing nicer now...or at least i think so...  
  
er....REVIEW!!! ONEGAI!!!!   
  
Oh yah...one more thing...this is not exactly advertising but all final versions of all the facfictions I wrote  
is on my website...coz i dun wanna bother changing it over here so...  
  
well...there's not much difference anyway...just spelling and grammar booboos...  
  
so REVIEW!!! PRESS DA LIL' BUTTON DOWN THERE!!! 


	6. chapter 6

Sorry for the delay. Really bad writer's block but I got rid of it now!!! 

*CC grins stupidly*

I mean I REALLy got RID of it!! I got the next chapter already planned so hopefully

won't take that long to finish this off.

Thnx for the support by the way! I really appreciate it!!

And this will be the second last chapter of Shattered Mirrors. If all goes the way I plan. . .

I beta-ed…myself…and added some things in…so…for those who read this ficcy before 9/14, pls scroll to the bottom and read it again…since you ppl complained about the lack of action…

Warnings: language, Hana-abuse, OOC Hana, OOC Rukawa

(Sorry Hana, I'm still abusing you . . .)

// . . . // -- emphasis

Sorry if there are any grammar mistakes. I don't have a beta. 

And the format turned out all weird again...sigh...

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Chapter 6

Somewhere in some Kanagawa hospital room…

White on white on white.

The innocent white wall sparkled cleanly against the innocent white sheets.

Hanamichi glared at the offending white walls. 

Great. . . how is he going to //pay// for all this?????

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

"It's the third day already." Ayako remarked, looking at Shohoku's players dashing and sweating around the court. Miyagi was yelling out threats to the unfortunate first-years unable to keep up with the demanding pace. 

"Third?" Haruko echoed in puzzlement.

"Third." The curly haired brunette mumbled more to herself than to her friend. Brown eyes glanced at the closed gym door and back to the team racing past her in full sprint, their pain and exhaustion etched clearly on their face. 

Ayako sighed and leaned against the wall. It was too peaceful, not that it was a bad thing, 

she quickly added mentally.

Much as she hate to admit this. . . practices seem to be missing something without Sakuragi. 

She sighed again. The petite brunette beside her sighed in unison as she wondered where Rukawa ////blush//// was. 

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

Never had he done this before. 

Rukawa was known to skip classes, but never basketball practices. Well, hardly anyway. Until today.

Rukawa had been staring at the hospital's gliding doors for over half an hour, trying to decide whether to enter or not. Half an hour ago, several of the hospital's staff were quietly discussing about the handsome, raven-haired, ice king standing forlornly outside, giving him covert looks and blushes. Now, they were quietly discussing whether they should bring the handsome, raven-haired ice king inside to the psychiatric ward.

The raven-haired boy sighed softly to himself, drawing what was left of his tattered nerves and stepped into the hospital. A few steps up, turn left, left again, up two flights of stairs, turn right, and right again. Rukawa nervously hiked up to the room where he had left his Hanamichi last night. 

Last night.

The blue-eyed kitsune thought back on that fateful night when he was out looking for that baka gray cat of his. Unknowingly, he had came across the rumored haunted park, where supposedly a girl with no face, wearing a red dress would rise from the pond and devour all passerbys' soul. Being a member of the Rukawa family, he naturally dismissed all superstition when he entered the empty park, still searching for that dumb cat, carrying its favorite catnip in one hand. 

Much to his surprise, he found his dumb cat without using the catnip. Even more surprising, or shocking rather, there was his do'aho sleeping underneath a willow tree. Several shakes and kicks later, Rukawa concluded that his do'aho must have fought with some rival street gang and lost. 

Hence the hospital, because Rukawa is completely clueless when it comes to injured, red-haired monkeys.

Rukawa hesitated by the door again. Should he go in? What should he say to him? Will his do'aho throw him back out? Mock him? Taunt him? Hit him? His hand hovered uncertainly over the doorknob. Well, maybe a peek. Just a peek to see if his do'aho is alright then he'll leave. 

Thus decided, Rukawa slowly opened the door a crack. One dark, sapphire blue eye peeked in cautiously. 

Then the other eye.

The room was blindingly white, no patch of red anywhere. Where the hell did his do'aho go?

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

Hanamichi had to admit it. Sneaking out of a hospital wasn't one of the smartest move in history. But then, Hanamichi's not supposed to be smart. Therefore, the red-haired boy concluded, as he leaned heavily on a nearby lamppost panting with his exertion, it was his / normal / behavior. 

Besides, there's always the question of hospital bills. 

He limped onwards back to Oyaji's house, one hand clutched protectively over a much bruised stomach, praying that the old man wouldn't be there. The old guy's probably pissed already. He hadn't been home to make him his breakfast. Not that it was his fault. But then, that doesn't really matter anyway. Everything was his fault afterall. 

Oyaji had drilled that into him.

Just like everyone did in Shohoku.

Perhaps he could make Oyaji's favorite meal to appease his anger somewhat. That means he would have to buy sake as well. Hopefully, the old man hasn't drunk the whole lot. He'd just bought it the day before yesterday afterall.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

Wishful thinking really.

Oyaji is never in a good mood, especially on days when Hanamichi skipped a meal. Thankfully, those don't happen often.

But when they do . . .

Hanamichi's brown eyes glazed over while his adopted father screamed, ranted and shrieked at him. It wasn't like it had not happened before. Oyaji screeched out all the cuss words in the dictionary and some that weren't in the dictionary, then cussed him all over again to make sure he didn't miss any. This really is getting kind of repetitive. 

" - good-for-nothing waste of space! Are you fucking listening, you idiot!?!?!"

Hanamichi started. Of course he wasn't listening! But he couldn't say that. That would be instant death, not that it would be a bad thing now. "Yes sir." The boy mumbled, keeping his eyes glazed on the tiled, kitchen floor. His hands were wringing the edge of his shirt nervously.

"Then what the fuck was I saying, you lil' shit?!" Oyaji grabbed the boy's collar and shook him roughly.

Hanamichi blinked stupidly, knowing if he did answer, the outcome would be the same anyway. He screwed his eyes shut for the anticipated impact.

First, the stomach. Oyaji always aimed it first for some odd reason. Then his chest, three or four times before Hanamichi managed to curl up defensively. Cold, empty eyes glazed as the man continued to attack him. The endless stream of blows, punches and kicks as well as the profanities screamed inbetween heavy pants. 

Strange, it doesn't seem to hurt as much as he thought it should, Hanamichi mused in some small part of his brain. He couldn't seem to feel the pain anymore. 

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

"What do you mean?" Shohoku's ace glared down at a blushing nurse.

The woman stammered and flushed again. God! This guy was hot! Much like that crimson-haired hunk in Room 237. Her right hand gripped her clipboard tighter as her left one swiped her raven hair out of her eyes. "S-Sakuragi-san," She stuttered, her face blushed even brighter at the mention of the hunk's name and under the piercing glare of the hot guy. "Doctor Mutari haven't released him yet. Perhaps S-Sakuragi-san," she blushed again, "is in the gardens or cafeteria."

Rukawa snorted. Yeah right. This nurse obviously had no idea what she's stuttering about. What is wrong with the female population anyway? Every time he talks to one, they act as though he had grown a third nose on his forehead!

"You don't know where he is?" He pressed on again, ignoring the reddening cheeks of the young nurse he is currently harassing mentally.

The nurse shook her head. 

Rukawa's blue eyes turned darker, into a shade of frustrated onyx. He should have known his do'aho would be alright. Why the hell wouldn't he be? His do'aho is strong enough to take care of himself. The baka probably woke up and wandered to play pachinko with the rest them idiots. [1]

The boy let out a loud sigh and stomped his way back outside the hospital. Damn that red-haired monkey. Now he'd missed basketball practice. Well, it wasn't like he missed out much, the Shorty's team wasn't that great to practice with. He'll probably learn more watching NBA videos and imitate their moves. Yes. That's exactly what he'll do. 

By the hospital's entrance, a raven-haired boy strolled casually down towards the nearest exit, ignoring the swoons and drooling female and some male, nurses as he determinedly began search on the nearest open, public basketball court. He had some practice to do.

TBC

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[1] – spelling? Pachinko? Or was it Pacinko? I'm not japanese…and I don't feel like looking it up…well anyway, it's those gambling machines that are not for people under age 18.

I really hope that you can read this clearly.

And I would really appreciate if you actually REVIEW. 

Wait, scratch that.

CC is psychic.

CC knows you're reading this.

CC won't continue unless you REVIEW!!!

So press da lil' button down there and Hana would be really happy. Coz if all things goes well, he won't be abused in the sequel . . . Ru will also be very happy coz he might just FINALLY get it going with his do'aho.

And yes, ppl out there. . . there is a REASON why he can't feel the pain anymore . . .


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